✗o✗o, Diana

♥

questions

the

heart

♫ I, I pray that something picks me up and sets me down in your warm arms. ♪

neo amiyeon andwae

一个人不可能

Sunday, October 7, 2012 @ 8:07 PM

I love the peace I have during weekends. My family is mostly out either working or doing their own chores and almost always I'd have the whole house to myself. I'll blast my music on the iMac, sing like a mad chicken, be as sloppy in the comfort of my own home.

But, I hate the weekends. I hate it because it is so quiet. I hate it because as compared to my hectic weekdays, weekends are much slow-paced. I hate it because weekends are a reminder to me that I just spent 5 weekdays rushing through meals, rushing through texting, rushing through conversations and all these are lost time that I will never ever get back. I hate it even more because when weekend comes, and I have all the time in the world to sit down and reflect on the week's doing, I'll feel like I accomplished nothing. NOTHING. And when that feeling of nothingness seeps in, I start to feel lonely.

Yes, I feel lonely during the weekends. Yet, despite all the loneliness, I don't like going out to meet people on weekends. I don't like the malls during weekends. Crowded like fuck. I don't like that I have to sacrifice my me-me time to queue for restaurants, squeeze in trains, wait in line just to try clothes. I don't like to share my personal space when I don't feel like sharing. So when I do, it will only mean one thing-you matter a lot to me. It's either you are special or you are not. There are no in-betweens.

Just re-read whatever I typed above. Been a long time since I penned a long entry. No prizes for guessing why. I'm feeling really down today. I had two super rough weeks and counting. Not helping that I'm all alone at home on a rainy Sunday evening typing away on my proposals.

Sigh.

Emo evening calls for an emo song. Recently hooked to 丁当's 一個人不可能 ever since hearing it on the Ch8 9pm show. I'm seldom a fan of mando pop but I love the lyrics. Love the emotions you get when belting it out. It's like you just wanna cry heartily so it'll make you forget all your sadness at that moment. Sometimes, you just need a moment to let go of your ego self and be at your worst.

I really love this song.

Please excuse me while I go and cry now. :(

只是我一个人一个人不可能
不可能有多快乐我承认
想回到两个人认真的两个人

一个人一个人不可能
不可能有多快乐多万能
再习惯一个人一个人再认真
认真也不能让幸福成真

Oh~ 一个人一个人不可能
不可能有两个人的灵魂
等待另一个人爱的另一个人

¬´ Previous