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BGR? lol.
Thursday, April 7, 2011 @ 12:46 PM
It is disheartening to know that guys hide a lot of stuff from their girlfriends. =(
I mean, where has honesty or truth in a relationship gone to? Undeniably, most of the time the guys just don't want to piss their partners off. Eg; clubbing, going out 1 to 1 with girls etc.
Guess nowadays, couples don't know how to draw the line. Then again, who was the one who set all these rules in a r/s? I have friends who are so lenient on their partners that personal space and privacy ranks top priority in their r/s. Then you'll ask, what kind of a r/s is that if both parties wanna lead their own lives? Might as well stay single, no?
I'm confused. Have times changed? Am I being too traditional or...?
When I was younger, I used to be pretty possessive over my exes. I used to think that that was one way to show tt they mean something to me and that I care. 4 yrs ago in that previous r/s, I got super paranoid over that ex. The guy fell for his "secret pal" during one of his NUS camps and eventually broke up with me. I felt so stupid being cheated on. Like, I actually knew he was hanging out one to one with her but guess I was living in denial. Which sucks lah seriously. No one should ever doubt your own r/s. It took me quite long to get over the whole broken hearted thing..but I'm happy for him now. He is still happily together with his secret pal. Yea I know, not meant to be.
I'm simple really. If my partner wanna go out with a girl friend, it's only common courtesy to keep me in the loop. I mean, just friends what right? Nothing to hide. I don't need like constant "reporting" or details about the hang out. I mean, if the guy does not tell the truth, wouldn't it be worse if I eventually find out? Or my friends come telling me "ehh I saw your boyfriend alone with so and so..". DUH RIGHT?
As for clubbing/partying wise, to be honest, I won't be able to take the fact that my partner gets all drunk and touchy feely/make out with other girls in the club. You know you are attached, so why wanna do that? That irresponsible action shows tt the guy/girl don't give a damn about the r/s. For this, I don't believe in "what happens in the club, stays in the club".
I am quite pertubed by the mindset of some of my guy friends. Last night, after clubbing, my friend told me that he checked in foursquare(to gain points in some iphone ap thingyy) but had to hide the feed from everyone (just in case his girlfriend finds out). And he told me that if he's out with 2 or 3 guys in a group, dancing with girls is the norm. I was disapointed lah. He is a very nice friend and I respected that he was honest with me. But somehow, something just feels not right.
Am I getting too long-winded for nothing? Hah.
Note-to-future-self : Seriously, if your partner wants to cheat, there are inifinte ways to do so behind your back. Be firm and talk abt things that you both don't like, be honest and be gracious as well. Compromising in a r/s is as important as trust. Most importantly, have faith. Coz really, if your partner is unfaithful, then he/she is not a keeper.
Be someone worthy of another by being worthy yourself first.
